this thing called Love, is supposed to be great amazing nurturing right? soo why is it soo damn hard to stay in a relationship? when ur constantly getting dumped, and they say its not your fault, you fell hard for them they caught you then let you go, just like that, and they say its not your fault… it makes you think that you werent good enough, and that you did something wrong to deserve this. im soo tired of being hurt, every serious relationship ive ever had ends up with me falling on my ass breaking everything i have in me. tearing me apart. i want to love you and i never want to let go of you. but when ur letting go of me this early but this late during the relationship, it hurts soo fucking bad. if you knew we werent going to stay together after you left, then why did you let me fall in the first place? and putting this decision off making me wait longer.. its hurting me and making it worse and impossible for me to let go because i promised you to love you with everything i have inside of me. and i have damnit. i know you have to. and you have to do what u have to do.. but you promised me you would never hurt me, the thing that hurts the most, is you not keeeping ur promise because i trusted you. i love you and now your letting me go. yeah people say maybe we are not ment to be together. but baby when we are alone, we are the perfect couple. you treat me perfectly, you are everything i want in a guy it dont get any better than you. your perfect in my eyes, yeah you make mistakes but your the perfect boyfriend to me. i dont want to lose you, because i will never be whole again after this.. you make me sooo happy and yet your tearing me apart at the same ime i dont understand it. how do you let go of something thts made you happy, treats you like a queen, loves you for who you are, brought you out of the darkness of depression, and stole your heart. how can u let all of that go just like that as if nonething meant anything to you. like we never meant anything to you. i wish you werent going away. i really do. i see spending the rest of my life with you. navy or not. im a strong girl but when your going to let go of me and put me on the ground i lose the strength to getup an move forward because ive fallen soo hard ive lost my head, my grip and my balance, i really need you in my life. so please baby dont go. dont leave me here with the heartache that dont stop hurting. i just need to be alone with you but i know its no good for me because it will only make me hold on longer.. ughhhhh fml i dont know what to doo. :((( </3
what do you do when you feel voulnerable? when you have the most amazing person in your life, and you know they will stay constant, but you cant help but to think of the person you really cant stop thinking about knowing they dont even think about you the same way you think abouthtem. how do you get rid of the pain and feelings behind every thought about them, how do you get rid of the pain and suffereing and stand up to them but in turn you dont want to lose them or hurt them because you have such deep feelings for them. i dont understand how i can be completely head over heals for him, i know he will always be here, he makes me happy i can trust him and know that he would never hurt me, but how is it, with all the great things like him in my life, that i still constantly think about her? about how things used to be, and why they just stopped soo abrupt? it leaves me thinking where i went wrong, when she says it wasnt me, but yet she cant give an example to explain what she feels. i cant stop thinking about her, and its gettin harder to resist the temptation that every time i see her i just want to run up behind her put my arms around her waste hold her close like she was mine and no one else could have her. but she constantly puts me down with harsh, rude cocky remarks. how do i let go!? i cant figure that out.. ive been trying to figure that out for some time now. she means alot to me, shes impacted my life humoungously. its hard to let go of someone who made such a big imprint on your life, heart and soul. but they belong to him now, not her so why cant i move on from those feelings whats keeping me holding on to her?! just wish i could figure this out and move on so i can love my boyfriend with everything that i have, and nothing holding me back. i wouldnt trade him for anything in the world. and i dont want to lose him, i just want this emotional mid-life crisis to go away and let me be freee! but i dont know how.. :(
THIS DESERVES A BILLION NOTES.
OMG. I am not ever not reblogging this. People need to be heard.
Everytime I will reblog. People NEED to see this.
Forever reblog.
READ THIS. Take a few seconds, and just read this. Then reblog it. Then think about it hard.
legit crying.
I am literally messed up now…
I don’t even know what to say. Read this please
it feels good to have someone i can come to at any time, and trust him with everything i have to own including my life, and know he wont screw it up. He is the only friend i have ever had like that. i’ve grown quite fond of him. i dont want to fall too quickly, but hes got soo many of the same views and morals that i do its unreal! i wish i knew how he felt though. theres alot of uncertainty here. thats not what i love haha. but hes funny. and makes me laugh. but more importantly i can trust him. i wish he would get to know me and let me get to know him. people say he would treat me with the upmost respect, and i need that. personally as much hell as he’s been through i dont want nothing other than the best for him. im a faithful person when it comes to him, always have and i want to be able to be the one he trusts with everything. lets just see how getting to know him goes first i guess.
im tired of feeling pain, guilt, depression, hatred to those who love me. im tired of getting hurt, put down, crushed, heartbroken, fooled, let down, torn apart. i wont take it any more. this may not be the best thing for some right now, but i gotta let go of a few people in my life, total alienation, blocking out the ones i dont need in my life, as well as the ones that keep bring me down, and holding me back from being free. i’m hanging on to too many people that keep hurting me and pushing me down. breaking my heart, tearing my world to pieces, well im taking a stand. im not letting them any more. it may hurt like hell, it may burn, it maybreak my heart a little more, but theres beauty from pain, what makes you wil break you if you let it. i dont want to hurt any of them but sometimes you just got to do what’s best for you, and right now i think its in my best interest to ignore every one i dont see fit to be my friend or in my life. only talking to the ones that make an effort to be there for me, to stay in my life, that i know love me because they show they care for me. but also letting go of the ones that are there but i just cant be around because they put to much pressure on my heart. i can not bear the pain of getting lead on by someone i truly care about. i cant do it! but i am aslo tired of feeling pressured. things between me and my friends aren’t the same any more. i cant stand it but i cant change him. i dont want to leave him more heartbroken than what he already is. but i just cant bear it no longer. i used to have strong feelings for him but now my heart is so numb, confused, and frozen it doesnt know what to think or feel it does not know the word love any more. because it can not feel it. alll i feel is the aching throbbing pain of confusion, heartache, and insecurity. the only way i can get rid of this, is to let go of every single person holding me back it aint what i want to do but its what i need to do i can not go on like this any more. i just hope i dont hurt any one in the process i cant bear to live with the regret of hurting any of them in this decision. too many times have i come home and cried my self to sleep like i will tonight, too long have i felt this pain inside of me. but i want to be stronger, i want to be free. im LETTING GO AND LETTING GOD! <3
single, taken, talking to someone who cares, tomorrow is Tuesday, February 14, 2012 its just another Tuesday to me, yes i have a valentines but i really dont care if i do or not. im talking to an amazing senior and hes mine, no one can have him. who cares about a stupid holiday to CLAIM or TITLE someone as Yours, a simple I Love You should suffice, not some out going expensive extravagant gift. I would rathter feel the love, then get gifts to show it. when an simple I Love You would do fine for me<3
